Alien Abduction Insurance
Protect your loved ones this Holiday Season with a $1,000,000 Alien Abduction Insurance Policy.
Inspired by Johns recent Extraterrestrial Experience
Hear us out...
After listening to his story of probing, pregnancy, and some other not-cool shit, he decided he didn’t want any of us going through the same ordeal, so he got us AAI as part of our employee benefits package, which allowed us to KKCO!
Regular insurance has its limits; it wont cover body snatching by non-human visitor from another planet. Go figure.
We bring you Alien Abduction Insurance
Thats why weve decided to cover the one thing that no one in the United States is doing: protecting your butthole from any Martian-related occurances. So next time you see lights in the sky, and you get whisked away by a UFO, youll feel better knowing that youll be covered up to $1M as a Policy Holder, should you undergo any unnatural probing experience. Suck it, Geico.
Be sure to protect your loved ones this holiday season with a $1M Alien Abduction Insurance Policy from theCHIVE!
